Just a little more push and I'm getting the beat back again...if I attached that title of a Visual Artist with my name I should at least be creating an artwork. These are not those art where I was push to do because of material gain like face painting. I have to make it clear that there are certain high I get too with face painting during parties but when I invoke an art work per se I am speaking of the vocation I have often wanted to spread thru my Visual Manuscript and symbolical pieces.
Yesterday I begun with a quick sketch...the usual portraiture to regain the void. You'll see here on your top right using colored-pencil. Then this morning still charged with the energy I grab the same sketch pad and head to paint...trying with a quick stroke in watercolor, it failed to boost me and so I set it aside. On my 3rd attempt finally I had it before I get to sign the next work...still with energy to spare I have the last piece for the day...
Just a couple of years ago i started to acquire these style of sketch--dipping any color as long as it is on the parallel color specs; these are not just random picking of tone but thinking ahead of the after effect it will cast. The style are now playful and easy going, unlike my careful and calculated stroke before...which perhaps have evolve from many aspect; one of which is my aging vision. Can't read anymore without glasses on and the limited time or resources I have to deal with. The poor quality of the camera phone does not give the real value of what is seen by the naked eye. 
Fixing the loose leaves of my visual journal worn by years of used...I have to prepare all of these for the treasure I will leave to my children. Does it value anything at all? Hopefully it will...and it must, at least for the effort given to them. It barely pass the antiquity test, of what? Maybe a classic art in contemporary nature...of about 30 years spend in this type of art expression and preservation. By the mere fact that every detail, tiny details are not just stamp on plain paper but had nostalgic references too. The same incapacity to focus on a singular line had me leap from one project to another or just randomly touch one area and then left it to the mercy of the future for completion. Calling it my weakness for having too much idea flowing on my brain. I bounce from being a scientist to a writer and then take refuge on my art when all seems going nowhere.
The mirror reflections of my sketches, its attitude reveals a certain aspect of my self. All the hope and dreams of a visionary. Now, I have 7 working manuscript at the mercy of the creative juice I can not tell when to burst...I don't want to be too heavy on my self. I just have to look back and realized that, Oh well time had elapse and behold I have thread the road only few are willing to travel. Maybe my eyes are straining me now...but still i can see my last scene as a painter.
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